Gamer mom won’t bake cookies until Cookie-Baking Plasmids are available
BioShock is popular enough as it is. But how do you know its popularity has reached critical level? It’s when mothers are convinced that they can’t do household chores without the help of Plasmids from Andrew Ryan.
As a humor post to lighten up the mood around here, we’re taking something that we stumbled across in a Blogspot entry from one gamer mom named Crystal. You may have heard about her – or not. But the important point here is that you can’t deny the impact that BioShock has among its many fans.
We’ve taken an excerpt from Crystal’s blog entry to share it with you guys. This one has Crystal and her 14 year old son Devon, who is trying to convince her to get BioShock – especially right after getting to play the demo:
“So, Mom. BioShock comes out today.”
“Mmm. I know. We need groceries. We’re out of milk. Don’t talk to me about buying anything.”
“I’ve been reading reviews. It’s received a perfect in every category. Awesome, huh?”
“Yeah. Milk. Meat. Vegetables. Costly. La la la. I can’t hear you.”
“You get these things called Plasmids and they control your abilities. And you can upgrade your weapons, even create weapons out of stuff you find laying around.”
“Growing children. Need to eat.”
“And this one ability? You create bees that pop up right out of your veins and they attack and kill.”
“Let’s go to Wal-Mart. You guys can live on rice, right? 20 bajillion Chinese people can’t be wrong.”
Now, here’s where he hasn’t figured out how to perfect this scam of his. You see, once we get the game home, I’m as good as useless for a few days until I finish it. He mopes and whines because he has to wait.
“When do I get to play? Why can’t you be like normal Moms and bake cookies and crap?”
“Does this game have a Plasmid for that? No? Then shaddup and wait your turn.”
Hello. My name is Crystal and I’m a gameaholic.
Yeah, we sympathize for poor little Devon. Not only is he deprived of getting to play BioShock (whether on the Xbox 360 or PC), but he won’t be able to stuff himself silly with some cookies before bedtime either. And to think he knew quite a lot about the game too, it’s sad to note that it’s actually rated M. If moms always know best, he’ll probably be deprived of BioShock for three more years.
As for Crystal, we do wish there were Cookie-Baking Plasmids available in the market today. You won’t believe how much the world would be a better place with more cookie-baking moms to go about (just leave out the Bee Plasmids, thank you very much). And likewise, we could probably use some Common Sense Plasmids as well – because some would say that common sense isn’t all too common nowadays.
You might want to click the Read link below to see the full post for some chuckles. Just don’t mind that bit referencing John Holmes – the BioShock bit is right after that section.
BioShock is popular enough as it is. But how do you know its popularity has reached critical level? It’s when mothers are convinced that they can’t do household chores without the help of Plasmids from Andrew Ryan.
As a humor post to lighten up the mood around here, we’re taking something that we stumbled across in a Blogspot entry from one gamer mom named Crystal. You may have heard about her – or not. But the important point here is that you can’t deny the impact that BioShock has among its many fans.
We’ve taken an excerpt from Crystal’s blog entry to share it with you guys. This one has Crystal and her 14 year old son Devon, who is trying to convince her to get BioShock – especially right after getting to play the demo:
“So, Mom. BioShock comes out today.”
“Mmm. I know. We need groceries. We’re out of milk. Don’t talk to me about buying anything.”
“I’ve been reading reviews. It’s received a perfect in every category. Awesome, huh?”
“Yeah. Milk. Meat. Vegetables. Costly. La la la. I can’t hear you.”
“You get these things called Plasmids and they control your abilities. And you can upgrade your weapons, even create weapons out of stuff you find laying around.”
“Growing children. Need to eat.”
“And this one ability? You create bees that pop up right out of your veins and they attack and kill.”
“Let’s go to Wal-Mart. You guys can live on rice, right? 20 bajillion Chinese people can’t be wrong.”
Now, here’s where he hasn’t figured out how to perfect this scam of his. You see, once we get the game home, I’m as good as useless for a few days until I finish it. He mopes and whines because he has to wait.
“When do I get to play? Why can’t you be like normal Moms and bake cookies and crap?”
“Does this game have a Plasmid for that? No? Then shaddup and wait your turn.”
Hello. My name is Crystal and I’m a gameaholic.
Yeah, we sympathize for poor little Devon. Not only is he deprived of getting to play BioShock (whether on the Xbox 360 or PC), but he won’t be able to stuff himself silly with some cookies before bedtime either. And to think he knew quite a lot about the game too, it’s sad to note that it’s actually rated M. If moms always know best, he’ll probably be deprived of BioShock for three more years.
As for Crystal, we do wish there were Cookie-Baking Plasmids available in the market today. You won’t believe how much the world would be a better place with more cookie-baking moms to go about (just leave out the Bee Plasmids, thank you very much). And likewise, we could probably use some Common Sense Plasmids as well – because some would say that common sense isn’t all too common nowadays.
You might want to click the Read link below to see the full post for some chuckles. Just don’t mind that bit referencing John Holmes – the BioShock bit is right after that section.